Lists. Because there is little else to do in the rainy season...

Reasons I will not reacclimate well to American life
1. I poop in a hole in the ground
2. I threaten to beat small children
3. I think bodily functions are an appropriate dinner conversation
4. I have no problom eating things I cannot identify
5. I eat with my hands
6. I have had breast milk squirted on me
7. I have been pooped, peed and vomited on
8. I don't consider #6 and 7 to be that big of a deal
9. I use words like "Inshallah" and "Basimilie"
10. Diarreah is more an anoyance than a problom
11. A crying child causes laughter
12. I spend more time in greeting than in actual conversation
13. When a man says anything to me, I assume he wants sex. Double if I don't know this man
14. I no longer have a problom with parents refering to their children as "it"

Only in Africa
-can paining your house eat away at your skin
-will vultures circle while you hang your laundry
-do you have to make it clear when you hire someone that you want the job done correctly
-can the phrase "you don't hit your wife?" be followed by "that is bad"
-is being hit by a donkey whip a legitimate concern while riding your bike
-can a simple pimple/paper cut/blister turn into a large oozing...thing...
-is buying meat a special occasion
-can a man hit on you while being treated for an STD, then be surprised when you shoot him down
-can a horse/cow/donkey falling down a well not be that strange
-can you get a marriage proposal from the man's wife